Wednesday 21 May 2014

Sun in next-doors yard

From my window I can look down into next doors garden and see that the sun hits their grass hours earlier than it hits my patio outside. It's extremely annoying because they hardly go out into their garden and have now bought a trampoline for their brat, which will no doubt be the cause of much racket and crying when he comes off it. I use the word brat not because I am referring to just any child, as a general rule I'm fond of children, but this one is not yet at school age and he's already a terror. I know, I live in the room that's next to his. The little swine screams and squeals like a girl and his mother screams back and he is clearly one of those 'crying out for attention-spoilt in everything else' kind of kid. He's their only one, thank god for that. I've heard him bashing stuff up, I reckon he must kick the door or something similar. More than once I've felt like posting a 'how to be a better parent' leaflet through their door. If the wretched mother ever does venture outside, it's only to sit smoking like lung cancer is fashionable and watch and shout at her brat. Sometimes I feel a bit sorry for the brat in fairness. If he were mine I am pretty damn sure he would be a very different child in his temperament. I'd make a brilliant mother one day. I'm not dwelling on that, I refuse to be broody.

I have to wait at least another half hour until the tiniest slither of my yard is bathed in sunlight and I can sit in it. I'm already so desperate for a job that I'm leaving my laptop on constantly with my C.V and cover letters open on the desktop just in case I suddenly get a call and have to go through a phone interview. I am so organised and prepared it's practically a scandal that I haven't been called yet. Don't these people know that if they employed me they wouldn't just get a hard working dedicated employee but give or take a few weeks they would adore me. People always do. Some are harder to break than others but eventually when I spend days of time with people particularly in a professional setting they roll over for love of me because oddly enough I'm jolly and funny and I like food. I am sickeningly nice to everybody, never say a bad word about anyone and after the sickening moment has passed they find all this rather endearing. It makes my life easier when people adore you and look forward to seeing you. I'm that bright bulb that cheers a workforce up. I've had the odd argument with people at work etc and no matter if I've fought back and given it just as good you know what happens? They later find me out and apologise! because and I quote "You're the nicest person, I feel so bad" ! :-o so...Someone really ought to employ me. I'm talented, I'm confident, I have all the general write up, give me a year I'll prove how awesome I can be if given a chance, but the important bit most people don't think about: I am a pleasure to work with, you will want to see me everyday, you'll look forward to it.
Someone employ me! I am awesome. I am now going to sit in the sun and write my book. If I am to be without work for a little while I will at least be productive.

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