Thursday 27 February 2014

Rowing the boat.

I always said after uni I'd do everything within my power to leave. I never quite believed that it would be within my reach when I got there though. The scary thing isn't the dream not coming true but it seeming to be more ready than me. No that's not quite right, I'm ready. I've been ready since I turned 16 maybe earlier. I already have a few little things packed away that I've saved for years, you know...bottom draw stuff...Plate set, some tea canisters. Not much. I leave university in May. If things work out I'll have a job and then can save some money. If I was alone this would be a plan years down the pipeline, but I'm not alone. I still get surprised when I remember that. It's like every now and then I remember "Hey somebody is crazy about you, isn't that fantastic!" ...yes it is. :-)

I know other students who have lived away for three years who have little choice but to move back home, whereas I stayed, I stuck it out so I wouldn't have to deal with the crippling reality of crawling back, and now it's my turn to think about stepping out of the door. It's going to take some time and that's if I get a job immediately. The amazing thing though is that it feels close. Within the next year, before next Christmas, maybe even before winter comes around I might be spreading wings, setting sail, rowing the boat and all that. It's actually not such an out of reach crazy idea...it's achievable, its certainly a reachable goal. It's the one thing I think I can look towards, and work for. It's something to keep me going if I start to feel like I'm drowning. That and my book. I don't think you're ready to help me get there Grace, you'll most likely be coming with me, and then I will finish you.

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