Thursday 27 June 2013

Still stressing about result

I felt like my exam went really well, too confidently I think. I knew a lot more this time round and the last question (250 words) I wrote a substantial amount that made sense. I'm still unsure if it's enough, is what I've done worth 40points? I was only scoring low 20's before but I was guessing half it. Thing is I have the feeling I've passed, I think I've done it, but that makes me feel worse because if I haven't it will hit harder. I still don't know what I'll do if I've failed. In fact I actually know what I'd like to do but that's out of reach and not the path of life I was intended for this early so I'm pushing that to the back of my mind.

It's funny how much I love those songs about being broke but being in love, and in that sort of music being in love is all that matters. My parents have always had that sort of crap on, my brothers too, it's ingrained in us lot because we're all broke half the time. I know if it all goes poison in the well then I'm going to refuse to be bailed out, not that I can think of anyone right now to bail me out of anything. I will do what I have to do and stand alone. I wish I just had a decent plan, one a little more exciting than the brainstorm I have at the moment.

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