Monday 4 March 2013

1. Sky Dive

My Skydive was without a doubt the best thing I've ever done. I thought being on the back of  a motorbike cruising on country lanes was an adrenaline rush but my god this beat it.
Gregory took me :-) and this is such a girl thing to do but I didn't eat incase I was sick and I wee'd and then wee'd again and literally pushed every last drop out because no way in hell was I risking wetting myself in mid air. There was really no need. If I am shocked and serious about one thing, it's that I wasnt scared. Not in the build up, or the instruction lesson or even when sitting in the plane. (My first plane ride too!!) I felt the excitement but fear didn't once touch me.




My skydive partner rushed us to the plane doors before anyone else, he said we'd get in first which would mean we'd be last out. The flight up was an experience sat directly behind the pilot. When the doors opened and one by one they dropped out like conkers from a tree. I was right at the back of the plane, we had to shimmy up the bench to reach the doors a good 2 minutes after everyone else had exited. I remember the noise and the jolt in my stomach, then I fell out. I wont say I threw myself it wasnt like that, one moment I had my feet on the floor then I tilted myself forward and everything went in slow motion. My thought process was a little funny, the first thing I realised was it was damn near impossible to breathe normally-my biggest fear. I thought,
"No, I'm not keen. This isnt for me."
Too late. I wasnt screaming, whats the point. I focused on sucking in air that was rushing into my face and when I felt the pat I spread my arms and then regretted it. I felt the force of gravity even stronger. The wind was ripping into me, or was I cutting through it? It was freezing. That was my next thought "It's sodding cold!"  I started to laugh. That's the freak I am, I laughed. Falling at 250 mph from 13,000 feet high is going to have an effect I guess.

When the shute was released and some bastard of a grip shot me backwards I had a black hole picture and panic jolt thinking "Crap we're going off course!" lol then we slowed down, and sort of just sat in the middle of the sky as if sitting in an invisible chair. Phew! I can breathe!!! ooo this quite nice. Ooo pretty patch work quilt of greens and browns, ooo this is lovely, I'm flying! 
"Take your goggles off."
Arr what! Who? Jesus! Jumped out my skin, I'd totally forgotten about the bloke behind me, controlling this thing oh my god. He could have been dead for all I knew. Well this is just lovely, drifting around, such a gorgeous view! but jesus christ! What the hell is that pain in my ears? another panic, I've blown my eardrums! Crap! My god this really hurts, F*** I never swear but F*** OW!
"Hold your nose and blow hard." That's what he said, tosser! I sodding did it didn't I. Effing christ S*** that Effing bloody killed!!!!! I can honestly say I have never felt pain, like I did in my ears that day. The worst agony ever.


But putting that aside, here we were floating through the sky and below me I can see a spectacular view of all the other parashutes, different colours twirling below me. So it was brilliant we went out last, I got the best experience. Chappy behind me started twiggling his whatevers and spinning us in the air, round and round and dipping and round the other way. I got the giggles pretty bad, it was serious fun! I saw Greg and The Keyholder sitting on top of the car, I waved like a nutter, then I actually thought "What a waste of £20! Insureance company ought to pay it back now I'm not dead!"
When we landed I was so giddy, the feeling was overwhelming. Couldn't stop smiling. :-)
Oh and I was starving. Really starving! Adrenaline must make you hungry.

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